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I'll Take My Fire With Ice

 
*"Days of prosperity make us forget adversity.
Good times seem out of reach during the bad ones.
Both can seem like final destinations,
the summation of our days.
Alas! Yesterday’s condition no longer."
.......

There are days I dread looking in the mirror.
A closer look through the window to my soul and I see fire and ice co-existing,
Not mixing, and yet neither one is consumed.
Like it were a respectable debate where one takes the podium and the other waits its turn.
 
A dream and a disaster both present in one space,
An inferno of love and hate,
A melody of calm quickly disrupted by fear,
Patience cut short and the words that exist in the boarders of my mind blurted out.
......

And then again there are days I can sit for hours staring at my reflection.
'What a beauty,' I think to myself as the same reflection I sometimes dread meeting stares back.
I am reminded that there is beauty in chaos.
.......

Away from the mirror and onto my window seat I look outwards.
I am now drawn to the balance of the scathing fire and chilling ice outside of my own frame. I am forced to look tradegy in the eye and not only be ok but look up, though with a teary face, and say thank you.
.....

I am grateful for stillness for it brought meaning to the quivers in my voice when I do speak.
I am thankful for your disregard for it brought my own prominence into perspective.
Healing gave way to roots in the field of growth.
Reflections cast my shadows at bay.
The sometimes overwhelming feels to remind me I am human.
Hope, the scar of the broken past.
And then of course love, the greatest of them all, to conquer hatred.
.....

It is hard to think of you in past tense but In the silence, lost in my thoughts, I found my voice. 
And it gave way to my love letter to loss.
Isn't it ironic that death causes us to celebrate life?
Mapped to new birth, in death, risen to newness of life.
More so that because I am 'good' I am even more flawed.

This then is my love letter to loss;
Running through your maze, I am found.


To all the times tradegy made me fall into more of who I am meant to be.

*"Death is swallowed up in victory
O death, where is your victory?
O grave, where is your sting?
......
But thanks be to God who gives us victory through our Lord Jesus Christ."



*
- Extract from Greenlights by Matthew McConaughey

- 1 Corinthians 15:55



Thank you for reading to this point.
It has been a long time coming and I must say I sure did miss writing and sharing a complete thought.
I hope I will have more meaningful things to say frequently.
Until then✌🏽 



Comments

  1. Jedidah Evelyn MukumboSeptember 13, 2021 at 6:38 AM

    Amazing stuff 🤍 thank you for sharing
    Its helping giving me hope even in the sad times

    ReplyDelete

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